רוצים להתלונן? תשקלו שוב – פילוסופים הסבירו בדרכים שונות למה חשוב לראות את הטוב באחרים, גם אם הם התייחסו אלינו רע

דינה גורדון | 11 ביולי 2024 | פסיכולוגיה | 5 דק׳

הנטייה לראות את הרע באחרים, במקום את הטוב

"כשהייתי בגיל ההתבגרות, האחים שלי ואני היינו לפעמים משחררים קיטור בינינו ומתלוננים על אנשים שהתנהגותם גרמה לחיינו להיות פחות נעימים. בדרך כלל כשמתלוננים על מישהו מרגישים טוב יותר, עם תחושה של סיפוק אחרי כמה תלונות", כותבת העיתונאית אנג'ליקה רייס. "אבל בכל פעם שאימא שלנו שמעה שיחה כזאת היא הייתה בטבעיות ובעדינות מוצאת דבר טוב לומר על אותו אדם שהתלוננו עליו. זו הייתה אסטרטגיה מדהימה שעבדה תמיד, אף על פי שמאוד לא אהבנו את זה, כי זה לא התאים למקום שהיינו בחיים. פשוט רצינו להתלונן. בכל זאת ההתנהגות הזאת של אימי הוטבעה במוחי.

"ככל שהשנים חלפו הערכתי את התכונה הזו של אימי יותר ויותר, עד שלמדתי ממש לכבד אותה. לראות את הטוב באחרים זו להבנתי הדרך הנכונה, גם כאשר אנשים אחרים מתנהגים אלינו רע. לאורך השנים הבנתי שזה קשור באופן מסוים בחמלה ובאהבה. לאהוב אחרים ולא להחזיר בעלבונות, לא משנה כיצד יתייחסו אליך".

סיפורה של רייס תואם לזרם חשוב בחשיבה האנושית שממעטים להזכיר אותו בימינו: החשיבות של ראיית הטוב באחרים. לא מדובר בזרם חדש, אלא ברעיון שקיבל ביטוי עוד בימי קדם בקרב פילוסופים, סופרים, פסיכולוגים ואנשים בעלי שם.

רוצה לקרוא עוד?

להמשך קריאה הירשמו או התחברו

צילום: Shutterstock

צילום: Shutterstock

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משחקי הרעב: איך לרזות באמצעות התבוננות פנימה

רקפת תבור

הירשמו לניוזלטר שלנו וקבלו תוכן חדש למייל מדי חודש

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